Mirror Mirror on the Wall

Hi, 

I Couldn't finish what I intended to post today so please allow me to re-post something from one of my previous blogs; something I wrote few years back. Many things in my life( and in the world too) have changed since then; but some have stayed the same. I wrote this post standing in the that space, which exists in the folds of a world which changes yet stays the same.

It's titled " Mirror Mirror on the Wall" 

Mirror Mirror on the Wall

 

Who is this guy?

Welcome to my blog.

A place where I intend to curate a world of my writings, my forthcoming books, interesting conversations and much more.

Something which I always wanted to do because of my belief that every life has a story; in fact many stories. Some sweet, some bitter, some perhaps tasteless and a few, hmm…. let's say having a lingering aftertaste, and I feel that a blog is a good place to share them, interactively.

Which I wished to do much earlier but for some barriers which prevented me from doing so.

First one being none other than Adam Smith, the founder of free market economy who perhaps very rightly taught this world, that the way to economic prosperity is through rational self-interest and competition which I took very-very seriously, pursuing self-interest and all that jazz in “Fortune 500s” of this world.

And the second and the more serious one being the potent virtue of procrastination which ensured that I witness all these stories passively, without taking any action on the calling which lay dormant in some recess of my heart.

But just by chance one day an overruling act of providence broke my slumber. It came in the form of “Bruno”, my beagle, and I am pretty sure that when Aristotle gave the concepts of “potentiality and actuality” trying to differentiate the possibility a thing might have, from the actual fulfillment of that possibility, he definitely must have included a beagle in his list of subjects for deciphering this dichotomy.

Bruno is fully actualized potentiality which means he is perpetually kinetic. It so happened that one fine morning when I was getting ready for office, Bruno for the very first time in his life sneaked into our dressing room which normally is out-of-bounds for him. I was struggling with my necktie in the full length mirror when suddenly I saw Bruno standing by my side peeping at me from the mirror. He obviously saw me, actually two of me, one outside the mirror and one inside it and got royally confused, which I gathered from that “ how weird is this” look on his face, typical of a beagle.

And then he saw himself and was shocked. He moved back a few feet growling and was at his wit's end when he saw the dog in the mirror too ceding ground. Bruno grunted and charged at the mirror and was flabbergasted to see the other dog grunt and groan too. This went on for about fifteen minutes before (perhaps) he understood that it was nobody else but him in the mirror.

The next morning as I was getting ready for office (this time with the dressing room door closed), Bruno started scratching the door from outside giving out those typical beagle wailing sounds which come out only when they want something. He was asking me to open the door. I allowed him in, and without wasting any time in niceties like wagging his tail or licking my hands, he straightaway proceeded to the mirror with a real nice swagger. He touched the mirror with his claws touching his image and then gave out a typical “Bruno chuckle” this time wagging his tail quite profusely. Then he receded back, then sideways, then again walked towards the mirror and this went on for quite some time.

He was thoroughly enjoying himself.

From that day on it became our daily ritual when Bruno would come inside the room to have a really nice time with “his self” in the mirror.He seemed to have fallen in love with what he saw in the mirror. 

I was quite worked out those days because of extreme work pressure and although I was doing well but had no clue where my life was going. Maybe I was a perfect example of Gurdjieff’s automaton- somebody who lives his life in a state of sleep not having the ability to perceive reality.

Then one day while getting ready I looked at somebody in the mirror and quite strangely my heart skipped a beat. I was not in sync with the person who looked back at me. In many ways it was like looking at a stranger. That day I couldn’t focus much on work and I don’t know from where these lines came out of me.

I wrote it in Hindi and titled it "दर्पण" and translated it in English as " Mirror". Am presenting both version here.  

Mirror

One day suddenly

standing in front of the mirror I felt

that it’s been ages since I met

myself.

In the jungle of life

by attaining speed

my boundaries expanded but

somewhere I separated, from myself.

I sometimes think that one day, someday

I will meet myself

and ask “Where have you been?”

“ What was your search?”

But till that happens,

there is the jungle, there is the speed,

there is the boundary and the breach of it

What is not is a meeting with myself..

दर्पण

एक दिन अचानक
दर्पण को देख, मुझे यह लगा,
कि है मुझे जरूरत,
खुद से मुलाकात की..

जीवन के अरण्य में ,
गति को पाकर,
विस्तार तो हुआ मेरी सीमा का,
किन्तु, मैं, मुझसे हुआ जुदा..

सोचता हूँ, एक दिन.. शायद एक दिन,,
मिलूँगा  खुद से,
और पूछुंगा
की क्या तलाश है तुझे ..

किन्तु तब तक
अरण्य है...गति है,
सीमा है, सीमा का उल्लंघन है
नहीं है बस, मुलाकात ....खुद से

Penning down these lines in itself was quite therapeutic and I knew that if kept on looking inside, one day I will find and meet that stranger, that “me” , who looked back at me when I stood in front of a mirror.

The process has started and I hope that this time I won’t let me leave me.

Have a fantastic weekend and keep checking out this space.

Cheers

Vivek